Squirrel, Tenacity and Joy
If you've seen the “Ice Age” movie, you know about the squirrel and his nut. I don't think there's anything else in that squirrel's life at all, except his nut. I'd say that nut is this squirrel's god! And he never gives up. He tenaciously “serves” his nut-god through the worst of crises. He experiences one small moment of the joy of accomplishment, relief and rest at the end of some unimaginable ordeal. And it all starts again!
I have tenacity. (Well, some of the time.) I can go at a task and push through at all costs – if I value my goal enough. And if I reach the goal I am very happy. Then along comes a new valued goal and off I go just like this crazy squirrel. I get "stuck" or over-focused when I get "into" something and in the end I become overwhelmed. I'll be excited and enjoy the work then lose the joy and have to struggle to finish the commitment. And to not stress myself to do such a "good job" every single day. I don't know about you, but I want lasting joy, not lasting suffering.
Too many of us Christians don't understand how to have joy in serving God. Some of us even go to an extreme of believing we aren't really serving Him if we enjoy it. We're supposed to suffer for the Lord. And if we are suffering in serving, or outside of serving, there seems to be no relief from pain.
My Dad was one who believed in self-deprecation and suffering. He wanted to become a pastor. He was a substitute pastor in small churches for many years. But Dad never did understand joy. He criticized people who were joyful and services that emphasized uplifting music and teaching. He felt that kind of thing was for self-satisfaction (in his opinion a sinful thing), not for worship or devotion. He had his happy times, but if he ever had a deeper joy, it wasn't there for me to see.
I'm sure I picked up on Dad's attitude unconsciously, even though I have always disagreed with his point-of-view. I spent nearly 50 years as a Christian who rarely experienced real joy. It took me a long time to understand God wants me whole and at peace, not worn out, anxious and over-burdened. He doesn't want me over-committed to His service – or to anything else in my life! God gives peace and joy, contentment, satisfaction - not drudgery, anxiety and self-chastisement.
The Bible asks us to "stay the course". That phrase would be a good definition for tenacious, wouldn't it!? Our squirrel sure has tenacity – we know he'll never, ever, give up protecting his nut! And why not? After all, he needs this nut. He's “staying the course”. I'd say he's committed to “sacrificial service”. But at what cost? He lives in fear for his life. Talk about anxiety! Where there's a will, there's a way! I don't think that's what God means though . . .
God doesn't want our works, as in us making it happen. He wants our surrender, the sacrifice of our will to let Him make it happen. The Bible talks about striving and carrying our burdens. But this isn't meant as physical effort and physical suffering. What God wants us to strive toward is yieldedness, closeness with Him, openness in witness and so on. The burden we carry is that we are compelled by having received God's gift of Grace to share the news of His great love! “Stay the course” means stay yielded. Let Him work in you and through you.
I watched a Christian TV program recently about dealing with difficult people - fools the Bible calls them. The point was made that we can't "get our needs met" by people, but through dependence on the Lord. We expect others to be what we "need" them to be. We live as if another person's attitudes can influence ours. This program was about relationships. But the principle applies to anything we think we need in order to be happy. We live in a perpetual “cup is half full” life, thinking, “If only, if only . . .” We are always pushing for our physical needs to be met and we miss out on spiritual satisfaction.
I think we can have joy in the midst of struggle, despair, discouragement and persecution. By getting our focus off providing for ourselves and trusting God to do that for us. Real joy lies deeper than physical satisfaction. It comes through the Holy Spirit by our yielding to God. That squirrel has no real joy during his struggle, he needs that nut! But also, that nut needs him! He has no spiritual source because his god is a nut. Our God is GOD! He is the need meeter.
We can't have our sense of spiritual joy all the time, because we're human. We face all kinds of physical limitations. I think I now understand joy. Yet I get distracted and forget, falling back into old anti-joy habits. In particular, stubbornly following my own will. I often have a very difficult time experiencing joy because of severe clinical depression and anxiety. I've "stayed the course" in that I haven't given up my faith, but I've fallen down many, many times. There has been joy at the end of each life struggle. But the greater joy is knowing God will get me through. The sun will come out again, this storm will be over. That knowledge brings a sustaining joy.
When I remember to be yielded during the worst, my pain can keep me from the physical experience of joy but it can't keep me from a deeper contentment and hope that comes from the Holy Spirit. The sense of accomplishment together with the Lord is far better than a sense of my own accomplishment. In the end joy comes from knowing God never left.
I had a difficult time getting the help I needed initially, for debilitating depression, because when medical people would ask if I was suicidal I would say "no". I wasn't trying to end my life or even tempted. That was because of God's sustenance and because of the faith He gave me. When I finally realized my situation wasn't being taken seriously, my true answer to the suicide question became, "I want to be dead." I was praying for God to take me. I wanted desperately to just go home - to Heaven - to the Lord. But somehow (someone!) I just couldn't even think about making it happen on my own. God was there sustaining me even when I didn't know it.
We all have a desire for Heaven but it shouldn't include the giving up of living. God wants us to want to go forward. I got the medical help I needed. It has taken a long time to recover, but that deeper joy has been there for me, despite the agony. During that time, I couldn't direct my will at all. I couldn't care enough. I had no choice but to surrender! Praise God, He has given me back a desire to live.
That little squirrel - he's so excited when he finally gets past a hurdle! Then along comes a new avalanche! Too bad he doesn't have the Lord to brace him through it! He experiences the joy of his own accomplishment, not of the Lord's love. And only for a few moments. Accomplishment is important in our earthly life but not in our spiritual walk. Leave the squirrel to his endless efforts and aim your tenacity toward the goal of yielding to God. I believe you will experience joy.
by Rebekah Wells
copyright 2008
